Death can be mystifying and troubling to a young person. We at Tudor's Funeral Home are willing to explain the processes of dying, death and bereavement to children.
Our children's program, which is conducted by a qualified social worker, offers interactive discussions of what happens when a person dies, what the children will see, and examination of the caskets, all in efforts to help children deal with the situation in an honest and caring setting before seeing their grandparent or other loved one. We encourage children to be part of the funeral by putting pictures, letters or other meaningful items in the casket. Young people may also act as honorary pallbearers during the service.
Should the Children Know?
Learning to accept death is a natural experience in life which, must not be ignored. Talking about death is necessary. It is a vital part of every child's development.
How Should I Explain Death?
Death is a subject most of us do not like to talk about but the fact of the matter is, eventually, we will all have to face it. We, at Tudor's Funeral Home would like to help prepare your family before the need arises. We have designed a program to meet the needs of your family, taking into account the ages of your children, your faith issues and cultural beliefs.
When & How do we Participate?
Individual appointments will be made for your family or group at a time that is mutually convenient to your family and ours. The program is best conducted at the funeral home in the Ivy, as this gives the children more of a hands on approach to learning. The intention of the program is to give a better understanding, and remove the mystery surrounding what happens when a person dies. Depending on the ages of the children and the size of your family or group, we would like you to allow us 45 minutes for a brief discussion, tour, and questions.
Caring for a Surviving Child
As in all situations, honesty is the best way to deal with children. Speak with, and not at them, in language that they can understand. Remember to listen, try to understand what the child is saying but more importantly, pay attention to what they are not saying. Children need to feel that the death of their loved one is an open subject and that they can express their thoughts or questions as they arise.
Adults can help prepare a child deal with future loses of those who are significant by helping the child handle smaller losses, by sharing their feelings when a pet dies or when death is discussed in a story or on television.
In helping children understand and cope with death, remember four key concepts: